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A seemingly grim rumor regarding the upcoming G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra has hit the web today. Director Stephen Sommers is said to have been fired from the film (which is now in the tail end of its post-production stage.) On the forums for producer, Don Murphy, a member under the name, Endtimes posted a thread which has essentially revealed the details behind this story. (Which I should note, is in dispute from other sources.)

So the story goes like this-

after a test screening wherein the film tested the lowest score ever from an audience in the history of Paramount, the executive who pushed for the movie Brad Weston had Stephen Sommers, the super hack director of the film fired. Removed. Locked out of the editing room.

Stuart Baird, a renowned "fixer" editor was brought it to try to see if it could be made releasable. Meanwhile producer Lorenzo whose turkey IMAGINE THAT explodes this weekend as the new bomb in theatres (also championed by Weston) was told his services were no longer needed on the film either.

Sommers was then forced by his William Morris agents to pretend that he was working on Tarzan over at Warner Brothers doing design work, even though that film doesn't even have a good script yet. When word of the firing started to be whispered about in Hollywood, Sommers was summoned back to the editing room- but only to save appearances, Baird is still editing the movie with studio input.

Hasbro CEO Brian Goldner, who turned down other offers from the property to go with the script that was rushed in 8 weeks by Stuart Beattie because of the writer's strike is frantic that this will destroy the brand and is distancing himself from the pending catastophe.

NONE of this needed to happen, except someone who did not know the mythology, Lorenzo was in charge of the film and never contradicted Sommers on anything. Lorenzo, so you know, was Chairman of Warners and had GI JOE under option there (not as a producer) for SEVEN years and he refused to greenlight the film, stating that because he gre up in Italy he had no knowledge of it. If you google enough, at one point you will see he wanted the film to be about an action hero named MANN (Action Man, get it) and he clearly had no clue what the GI Joe world really was.

And the hapless hack Sommers? Where did he come from? The confused Jon Fogelman at William Morris, who signed Hasbro away from CAA, had to find a director in a hurry for his new clients and gave him the only guy who he repped who would do it. A sad end to what COULD have been a great franchise. Acceleration suits indeed.

Ouch! (Although I do find it ironic that such a stinging creative criticism was posted on the forums of a man who was credited as a Producer on Double Dragon.) Don't get me wrong, while the 80's G.I. Joe purist in me was underwhelmed by the creative direction we saw in those initial trailers, there still seemed to be potential for some satisfying ass-kickery. However, it was immediately clear that Paramount did not go through the trouble to seek out a script which was at least inspired by the atmosphere of the comics and cartoon series. What we saw was something that was trying to be the James Bond film that John Woo will (thankfully) never make. I'm not the kind to completely condemn a film before I see it, but I think that based on the trailers and the character pictures that have surfaced, I DO have a right to comment on the stylistic direction. Barring Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, the characters look pretty lame. (Don't even get me started on Cobra Commander.) Based purely on that, putting it into kinder terms, it's a bit "inauspicious."

We've heard similar last-minute "disaster" edits regarding X-Men Origins: Wolverine, with its "leaked" version, and re-shoots taking place as late as a mere few months from release. In the end, those things did not end up being a factor against the success of that film (even though the film was met with mixed criticism.) However, if it turns out that Sommers really did get handed his pink slip from the film, then we may have to take it as a sign that something went horribly wrong with this film.

I said it before, and I'll say it again. I am not trying to be a hater, I just want to be entertained like anyone else. Being proven wrong on early criticism is the best gift I could get. Will G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra prove me wrong? I sincerely hope so. The August 7 release is not that far down the road.

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